When You Eat Your Emotions
One of the symptoms of (or maybe a contributing factor to) my depression was losing touch with my emotions. I’m very familiar with sadness. But I struggle with other emotions, especially anger and happiness.
Over the past few months, whenever I was going through a hard time, I ate my emotions. Perhaps the (mostly junk) food I ate would resolve the emotion, I thought. It didn’t. Instead, my unexpressed feelings became stuck in my body, like the junk I devoured. It wasn’t long before my self-esteem took another blow and I started hating myself even more than I already did.
I feel exactly like you! I remember how happiness felt but fail to feel it now. I realize if something is funny but I fail to laugh. I appreciate the beauty of something but fail to smile. I feel so dull…